Over the next few weeks, I am going to do a series debunking some of the common myths about marriage. I decided to start by addressing one of the top reasons people say they should get a divorce. They believe they married the wrong person. Some of them will tell me that they did not consult God before plunging in, while others will tell me that they did pray about it, and felt sure that God had told them "no," but did it anyway. Then trouble hits, and they feel they have no option but to get out.
So let's be brutally honest here. Maybe you did marry the wrong person. Maybe God, in His infinite wisdom, knew that you were choosing the difficult path and you had heartache coming. Before you rush out and seek a divorce attorney, let's see how God feels about us getting into a relationship he forbade. The answer to this can be found in the book of Joshua, chapters 9 and 10.
I will give you a Cris-style paraphrase of the story. The book of Joshua opens with the Israelites finally entering the Promised Land, under the command of Joshua. They defeat Jericho in a stunning upset, so they are pretty pumped about their new homeland. God tells them that they are going to possess the rest of the land by driving out its inhabitants in battle. The one big rule they have to follow is this: Do not make a treaty with anybody! What could possibly go wrong?
Immediately after that, they got tricked into an alliance with their next door neighbors, the Gibeonites. The Gibeonites had heard the Israelites were gunning for them, so they came up with a bit of trickery and pretended to be from a faraway land by making themselves look trail-worn, like they had a long journey. The ambassador went up to Joshua and told him they had come from a faraway country and wanted to make a peace treaty with the Israelites. Rather than consulting God, Joshua made the treaty. Then they found out they were tricked. The Israelites wanted to wipe them out, but knew the way God felt about covenants. They had to honor it. So here they were, stuck in a relationship they were strictly forbidden to be in. Sound familiar?
That's when things get really interesting, because other kings heard about this and decided to go to war against the Gibeonites. And the Israelites, because of their treaty they were tricked in to, had to go fight for them. God's response? If you were expecting a cosmic "I told you so," you would be incorrect. Instead, the Lord reassures the Israelites by telling them not to be afraid. The Lord Himself was guaranteeing their victory! Then, in the midst of the battle, Joshua made a stunning request of the Lord. He asked God to make the sun stand still so they would have more daylight to win their victory. God's response? He did it! He made the sun stand still! It says, "The sun stayed in the middle of the sky, and it did not set as on a normal day. There has never been a day like this one before or since, when the Lord answered such a prayer." (Joshua 10:14)
I find this staggering. This is the biggest miracle in the Old Testament, and it was done at the request of Joshua, who had made a colossal mistake in making that treaty, fighting for a covenant they were not even supposed to be in. Joshua did not hang his head in shame after his mistake and seek a divorce attorney. He knew his God, and knew he could call on Him for help. So can you. I'm not saying that your covenant was not a mistake; I am saying that we have a God who fights for us, even when we make huge mistakes. His heart is for you, and he loves that infuriating person you are married to. He is willing to do whatever it takes, even make the sun stand still, to deliver a victory into your hands. He is way better than you know, and wants to fight the battle against your enemy, who is not your spouse, by the way. Go ahead, call on Him for help, and see if He hasn't still got a miracle up His holy sleeve for you.
CRIS CORZINE-MCCLOSKEY is a licensed clinical social worker and director of Caring Counseling Ministries, located at 1410 W. Chestnut St. in Marion. It is a not-for-profit corporation that provides counseling from a Biblical perspective at an affordable price to Southern Illinois residents. To make an appointment, call 618-997-2129.
